3:43 minutes

Poetry by Jade Rawlings


Tell me about your existence,

Do you shine or do you sear?

Melt the wings from my back,

Just to feel your warmth,

To love you is to hurt,

To lose you is to die,

Tell me a secret,

Any secret,

Whisper in my ear,

“It burns, it burns, it burns

To exist from nothing,

The breath of god;

A spoken word,

It burns.”



How come,
I can sit on the floor
Of a dirty bathroom,
And convince a stranger with a knife shes pretty?
She’s beautiful,
She is worthy of love.
Her bloody arms in my hands,
As i rinse them with sink water.
Pull out the band-aids from my purse,
Scribble the number of a suicide helpline on her notebook.

Those words refuse to be spoken to a mirror.
Why can i help everyone but myself?

How come i can stay up all night with a friend
and convince her to believe in something bigger than herself,
That there is a meaning behind all of her struggle,
Crafted by the hands of a God
She was made on purpose with purpose,
I watch her almost glow as she emerges from
Her backyard pool,
Baptized at 3 AM.

Where is my faith when i need it most?
Why can i help everyone but myself?

How come i can stand up for the girl
Being kicked in the back of the school,
Get in the faces of her bullies and tell them where to shove it,
Help her off her feet,
Walk her to the nurses office,
hold her hand while she calls her parents crying.

Why do i let him hurt me?
Why can i help everyone but myself?