Don’t Cry

5:20 minutes

Don’t Cry, the title, is from lyrics in the song Carry on Wayward Son by Kansas. I suspect me selecting this poem is about feelings of childhood abandonment.

Carry On Wayward Son was written by Kerry Livgreen. Kerry Allen Livgren (born September 18, 1949) is an American musician and brilliant songwriter. He’s best known as one of the founding members and primary songwriters for the 1970s progressive rock band Kansas. He and his band played at my high school in Manhattan Kansas and they were mentors for our band, FrostFire. We played several of their songs in our music sets.

After three albums in two years failed to provide them with a hit single, Kansas was under pressure from Kirshner and CBS records to write a hit. Livgren and the band realized it was their last chance. Due to Walsh experiencing writer’s block, Livgren wrote or co-wrote all the songs for the group’s fourth album, Leftoverture. On the last day of rehearsal for the new album, Livgren brought the band one more song, which they performed once before heading to the studio. The song, “Carry On Wayward Son“, became Kansas’ first hit, reaching No. 11.

I created the soundtrack in the following way: Levi sent me a link to the dissonant reimagined cover of the Kansas song. I loved it. I then ran it through a beat meter and found it was 120 beats per minute. I then downloaded and converted the original Kansas YouTube video to an MP4 format. It was 99 bpm. Listening to them both, I realized the reimagined 120 bpm song measurement must be a double count of the rhythm and really around 60 beats per minute. I tried layering the music on top of each other in OpenShot video editor. That produced cacophonous noise.

I then decided to slow down the tempo of the original song using Audacity to 60 bpm. (Audacity is free and open-source digital audio editor and recording application software). It still didn’t layer well on different tracks in OpenShot. Amazingly, I liked the sound but missed the original acapella vocal introduction. So I kept that intro section the same tempo of 99 bpm. For whatever reason, this switch midstream – combined with the storm video – worked for me.

Then I began collecting images and video clips. So the sound track modification came first then the image selection. It’s a dark theme.

Symbolism

I’m still working on it. But it’s about childhood trauma. I suspect abandonment after my mom’s suicide attempt when I was 7 years old. Dad probably left me and Brad at home alone while he took unconscious Mom to the hospital. I thought she was dead. No idea.  No memory. No witnesses. Nothing was ever said about it and I have trauma amnesia. More therapy for me.

HOUSE ON FIRE

House on fire indicates I need to undergo some transformation.

Web Assets

Soundtrack

60bpm-test-Kansas – Carry on Wayward Son (Official Video).mp3
99bpm-Kansas – Carry on Wayward Son (Official Video).mp3
120bpm-Carry On Wayward Son – Kansas – reimagined cover by Neoni

Sound effects

Babies_Cry.mp3
Baby_Whine.mp3
Crash.mp3
Crowd_Talking.mp3
Desert_Howling_Wind.mp3
Distant_Thunder.mp3
Emergency_Siren_Close_Long.mp3
Female_Distress_Screams.mp3

Stills

il_794xN.1973877973_5njp.jpg
k-180-ake-380.jpg

Video excerpted from previous poems

clown.mp4
doll.mp4
sand.mp4
storm.mp4
grave.mp4
heaven.mp4
house-fire.mp4
train-Pexels Videos 2119145.mp4

Carry on Wayward Son

Kansas

Carry on my wayward son
For there’ll be peace when you are done
Lay your weary head to rest
Don’t you cry no more

Once I rose above the noise and confusion
Just to get a glimpse beyond the illusion
I was soaring ever higher, but I flew too high
Though my eyes could see I still was a blind man
Though my mind could think I still was a mad man
I hear the voices when I’m dreamin’, I can hear them say

Carry on my wayward son
For there’ll be peace when you are done
Lay your weary head to rest
Don’t you cry no more

Masquerading as a man with a reason
My charade is the event of the season
And if I claim to be a wise man, it surely means that I don’t know
On a stormy sea of moving emotion
Tossed about I’m like a ship on the ocean
I set a course for winds of fortune, but I hear the voices say

Carry on my wayward son
For there’ll be peace when you are done
Lay your weary head to rest
Don’t you cry no more

Carry on, you will always remember
Carry on, nothing equals the splendor
Now your life’s no longer empty
Surely heaven waits for you

Carry on my wayward son
For there’ll be peace when you are done
Lay your weary head to rest
Don’t you cry no more