Deep

2:39 minutes

DEEP

Last night as I lay in the black of night, away from the collective consciousness of the world, deep in slumber, I had a dream:

We danced with our hearts close,
rather than separated by oceans of defenses,
of pretenses, of fears,
of towering walls of mistrust.
So afraid of the other’s truth.

Rather we pulled each other in close.
And placed our warm hand on the thumping heart of the other
and talked and shared,
and trusted and cared.

I deep into you. You deep into me

We stripped “naked.”
Dropped our defenses;
forgot our pretenses;
lay waste to our fears and flattened those towering walls.

Our souls bare and defenseless to each other,
exposed to the gaze of the other for just a moment…
or an eternity.
Protective of one another.

You deep into me. I deep into you

Our eyes were open like those of a newborn babe
gazing on the world for the first time;
our ears waited patiently;
our arms open, beckoning, eager to be filled;
our hearts already full.

I deep into you. And you deep into me.

Mmm…

Then, I turned to go deeper into my dream, but instead I blinked and squinted at the bright light of a new day peeking through my bedroom window. It was already morning.

And I realized, oh, it was just a dream… and I was very sad — for it was a sweet, sweet dream while it lasted.

Rusty Cart Rebooted

2:45 minutes

THE RUSTY CART

By Steve Teare

See the puny heart spin
Rollin’ in the gutter.
Clatter, clank, such a din.
Makes one wonder where it’s been.
Is it such a hellish sin
to love another?

Gimme work, gimme money
that’ll cure all ills, honey.
Drown in demon distractions!
Satiate with surface satisfactions!
Transform the sky, gray to sunny.
March ’em, dance ’em. Ain’t it funny.
Peering down a tunnel dark
Life a wild hopeless lark.

More noise, more lights.
Soak the senses in delights.
Cover up, bury deep
Screaming feelings that won’t sleep.
Yank the stabbings from the heart.
Cram them in a rusty cart,
And roll them off to hell!

There they’ll burn, smashed and broke.
Melt and simmer, smoldering joke.
Still we drink the caustic smoke.
Breathe it in. Expand the lung.
Corrupted crawling fetid dung.

Devours the insides to the outsides.
Powdered nothing.
Only sobbing song.
Hear it echo.
Fading. Faded. Gone.

RIP

2:02 minutes

Mirror, Mirror

In the world that lies within me
I’m witness to a crime
I see the gaping wound
Cry for the pain that is caused
I am angry! My energy focuses
This is cruelty
No human should ever be called upon
To endure.
I share the hurt,
Divide the pain,
‘Til it is diluted away.
I call upon love’s healing powers
To erase the scars
So carelessly inflicted.
While upon closer inspection
One discovers
Naked, ugly scars,
Gaping wounds
In the countenance
Of the attacker.
Is my love sufficient?
Maybe not.
But there is
One
Whose love heals all wounds;
Forgives all who carelessly
Assault another…
Even me.

Terrie Teare 4-20-1992

Holy

2:27 minutes

by Jade Rawlings

HOLY

Salvation doesn’t taste like light,

It tastes like burning coals,

Holy wine isn’t so delightful

as it drips thick crimson from the alter,

Those angels you color so beautifully,

Have thousands of eyes and they are made of fire,

This wisdom of Solomon is not crystal clear,

Is drenched in the black baptismal water,

You kissed a prophet once,

and had nightmares of cities burning

For months after,

To be a martyr is to be sacrificed

To be sacred is to be made of splintered bone,

Rosanna, rosanna, rosanna, to our God in the highest,

Rings in your bleeding ears,

We weren’t made to be holy.

PRODUCTION NOTES

Kdenlive open-source video editor

Assets

Stills: black-sparrow-flying-design.jpeg, Jade.PNG credit, Steve.PNG credit

MP3: dizzy-logo, holy-motion.mkv

Voiceover: holy-VO-final.mp3

Music soundtrack:
Outro: Pouring Out – Aasher Fulero.mp3
Fortunate Note – Silent Partner.mp3

Sparrow

3:43 minutes

Poetry by Jade Rawlings

SUN

Tell me about your existence,

Do you shine or do you sear?

Melt the wings from my back,

Just to feel your warmth,

To love you is to hurt,

To lose you is to die,

Tell me a secret,

Any secret,

Whisper in my ear,

“It burns, it burns, it burns

To exist from nothing,

The breath of god;

A spoken word,

It burns.”

 

A PORTRAIT OF INSINCERITY

How come,
I can sit on the floor
Of a dirty bathroom,
And convince a stranger with a knife shes pretty?
She’s beautiful,
She is worthy of love.
Her bloody arms in my hands,
As i rinse them with sink water.
Pull out the band-aids from my purse,
Scribble the number of a suicide helpline on her notebook.

Those words refuse to be spoken to a mirror.
Why can i help everyone but myself?

How come i can stay up all night with a friend
and convince her to believe in something bigger than herself,
That there is a meaning behind all of her struggle,
Crafted by the hands of a God
She was made on purpose with purpose,
I watch her almost glow as she emerges from
Her backyard pool,
Baptized at 3 AM.

Where is my faith when i need it most?
Why can i help everyone but myself?

How come i can stand up for the girl
Being kicked in the back of the school,
Get in the faces of her bullies and tell them where to shove it,
Help her off her feet,
Walk her to the nurses office,
hold her hand while she calls her parents crying.

Why do i let him hurt me?
Why can i help everyone but myself?

You Belong

2:53 minutes

When I heard that my first day was dawning

When I saw the morning clouds falling

When the stars of the nighttime were fading

You were there with me

In my mind

OOh OOh oo

You’re my everything

now you’re gone

voyager with air

Now I’m in despair

Why does life have to be so unfair?

I would wait for you

my whole life long

Oh why won’t you say

you belong

The Library

2:47 minutes

you wear the smell of death and rage like perfume,
he smells like an abandoned library,
a grand piano in the corner,
stunning,
you long to run your fingers over the keys,
but would the blood on your hands taint its beauty?
there is sort of a soft cider in his eyes,
the kind you sip by a fire,
listen to it crackle,
it brings soft memories,
yours rumble a warning.
the sky is darkening,
there’s a storm brewing somewhere
off the corners of the map of the world,
if he is a star, then you never knew they had flavor,
they taste like ambition,
and ancient wisdom,
but what does that make you?
some sort of abyss?
and what if he finds your darkness beautiful?
what then?

 

Bring blue skies back
show me around
perfect imperfection
shed your skin
yielding
show me
help me now.

I lay my burden down
time moves alarmed
nothing sets me free
like your creativity
You’re home to me.

Exciting journey
Timely untamed
Miracle reflection
Hold me tight
knife my pillow
in the night.

Alone together
stunning electric
energy angel
be happy too
diamond shining.

Do you think of me?
I won’t lie to you
sweet breathing
walk through my door
touch my mind
feel the hush?

Stillness
focus on me
soul heartbeat
rescue me
love your company.

Fingers

3:47 minutes

FINGERS

is there solace in idle conviction?

what brought us here to begin with?

among the ruins of a crippled empire,

our fingers scramble at crumbs of redemption,

hand bruised and bleeding,

the blood under my nails will stain, and collect,

we aren’t heroes any longer,

were we ever?

tragedy’s of firelight and flesh,

hands like these, they shake, fingers twitch

they remember what they’ve done,

knuckles of spite,

nails splintered,

unholy sacraments of broken bodies,

watch our fathers shake fickle fists at calloused deities,

watch our mothers fold flags with their trembling fingers,

what use do we have for feeble hymns of wasted faith?

our names written in sordid songs of feeble glory,

but look at us,

look at us.

our hands ready the cannons,

they clutch our dying brothers,

our fingers pull the triggers,

they bury our friends,

these hands, these hands,

they remember.

by JADE RAWLINGS

Touch

4:48 minutes

In Spanish, you don’t play a guitar. You touch it (tocar).

Now if you feel that you can’t go on
Because all of your hope is gone
And your life is filled with much confusion
Until happiness is just an illusion
And your world around is crumbling down, darlin’

Come on girl reach on out for me
Reach out for me
I’ll be there with a love that will shelter you
I’ll be there with a love that will see you through

When you feel lost and about to give up
‘Cause your best just ain’t good enough
And you feel the world has grown cold
And you’re drifting out all on your own
And you need a hand to hold, darlin’

Come on girl, reach out for me
Reach out for me
I’ll be there to love and comfort you
And I’ll be there to cherish and care for you

I can tell the way you hang your head
You’re not in love now, now you’re afraid
And through your tears you look around
But there’s no peace of mind to be found
I know what you’re thinking
You’re a loner, no love of your own, but darling

Come on girl reach out for me
Reach out, just look over your shoulder
I’ll be there to give you all the love you need
And I’ll be there you can always depend on me
I’ll be there